Recently, my husband overheard a conversation about “tramp stamps”. He was engaged in a conversation of his own but he wanted to comment so badly. He chose to keep his opinions to himself...well, at least until the ride home. It’s not the first time he has held his words back when overhearing the tramp stamp talk. Recently, he also made it known how bothered he becomes when people make blonde jokes. He’s protective and I love him for it but truthfully it bothers him more than I. I just smile and tell him it’s okay. When it comes up in conversations of my own, I only sit and listen. You see, I have one of those “tramp stamps” also known as a tattoo on the small of my back. I’ve had it since I was 19...right along with my belly ring (which I still love both and regret nothing about them!) and I’ve been some shade of blonde all of my life. But those things don’t define me. Well, some people do choose to define me by those descriptors but that girl in the blonde joke isn’t me. That tramp you refer to isn’t me either. I’m a mother of two boys. I’m a wife to the same man I’ve been in a relationship with for the past 8 years without any hint of infidelity. I have an associate’s degree, a bachelor’s degree and a master’s degree. I graduated in the top of my class. I have a successful career. That tramp and dumb blonde aren’t who I am. Sure, I am socially awkward at best as my brain is searching around for the next topic of conversation but that is the introvert in me and I sometimes blurp out that my son is 20 months because somehow my mind got off track to Gideon and his age and then the age difference between him and Gabe and him to another child...
These things, although they are more accurate than the aforementioned, are not truly who I am either. As I have said before, I am a child of God. This is who I am. I could lose my husband, my job, my children but they are not my identity. Christ is my identity.
Maybe this is why it bothers Lance more than it does me. It’s easy for us to get caught up in our accomplishments and want to defend them but we have to remember that it is all temporary. It’s easier for me to hold onto that for myself than it is for him to hold onto that for me. The role is often reversed when I hear police bashing and I automatically go into protect mode...even though he may not be active any longer, he will always be a police officer. When he was active, he was often brushing it off and calming me down. He was the one telling me to hold my facebook posts. So I get it. But again, that’s not who he truly is.
When I get to Heaven, God isn’t going to care about the sunset on my back or that I went to graduate school. He’s going to want to know if I knew Him. Did I know Jesus? Did I love Jesus? Did I show the love of Jesus when I was here on earth? Those qualities are what truly matter.
So I say all of that to say this, it doesn’t matter what label society has placed on you. It doesn’t matter what you have or what you don’t have when it comes to material things and social standards. The only thing that matters is Jesus. Find your identity in Christ.
I hope that as we raise our children, we will ground them so heavily in this truth that their spirit may not be broken by mere words of another.
For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory. --1 Thessalonians 2:11-12
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| Blonde curls. Blue eyes. |
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| My tattoo! On the beach of Gulf Shores. |
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| My loves and the vast beauty of God's creation behind them. Family vaca to Gulf Shores. |
